The presence of God is a place of making. It is a place of version updates. Some features and functions you possess in your present version will become obsolete or unsuitable for 2019, therefore you need to upgrade/update to tap into your full potential for this year.

When you come into the presence of God He updates you and add features that are more suitable for the challenges of 2019. He also removes viruses and bugs that has been causing malfunctions in your life.

No matter what, determine and consciously strive to stay in the presence of God this year.


I recently observed that a lot of people seem to be enjoying a blissful marriage at the expense of their wives or husbands. This happens when one person thinks everything is all sunny and rosy in the marriage while the other partner is hurting, angry and bitter in the marriage. It is therefore of utmost importance to ensure that you and your partner are on the same page or else that marital bliss will be one sided.

One of the major source of tension in marriage is decision making. Who makes or takes all the decisions in marriage? In my few years of working at the public sector, I observed that the staff make the decisions while the head takes the decision or decisions as the case may be. What is the difference, when there’s an issue at hand and you are assigned to work on it, after introducing and analyzing the issues in the first four or five paragraphs, the last paragraph is for recommendations. In that paragraph you propose a possible soluble for the matter at hand and submit for consideration. If your recommendations are apt, it will be approved by the head for execution.

So what’s the difference between decision making and decision taking? In decision making, everybody lays down their cards on the table and it is all carefully considered. After a careful considerations of all options and opinions, the most suitable one is taken, this is decision taking.

How does this apply to marriage? When an issue is on ground, both husband and wife should be allowed to make their input, or recommendations. When one person makes and takes all the decisions, it becomes an autocracy not marriage. The advantage of decision making is that it allows one to be creative and objective in their thought pattern, it also make one feel important that your decision was considered even if not taken.

Amos 3:3
Can two walk together, except they be agreed? (KJV)

Agree means to be of one opinion about something. Notice that King James used the word ‘agreed’ indicating that before the walk even started both of parties had agreed. This means before any decision is made in marriage both husband and wife should have agreed on it before even starting the execution. If one person makes and takes the decision, they’re are walking alone, not together.

Most people are unhappy in their marriages today not because their decisions were not taken but because they were not even given an opportunity to make a decision not to talk of considering their decisions. Some are forced, tricked, blackmailed or intimidated into accepting a decision. The decision maker/taker goes off saying how good the marriage is why the other partner languishes in bitterness.

What happens when a decision cannot be reached?
Watch out for my next article.


During our female bible character study with my group, we discussed Joanna in Luke 8:3, how she, Susanna and other women provided for Jesus and His ministry out of their own substance.
Luke 8:3 (KJV)
and Joanna the wife of Chuza, Herod’s steward, and Susanna, and many others who provided for Him from their substance.
So it got me thinking, this must be where the term ‘woman of substance’ came from.

The story struck a cord in my heart because it is the will of God for women to be prosperous and possess their own substance irrespective of who their husband is or what he has. Joanna was a highly placed, wealthy and influential woman as a result of her husband’s position as Herod’s steward/manager. However, she still had her own substance, her own money (which she chose to use to support Jesus’ ministry).

From the story, the bible did not say that it was their husband’s money that these women used, it was their own personal money and resources that they used for a course they chose…ministry.
Luke 8:3 (ERV)
Also with these women were Joanna, the wife of Chuza (the manager of Herod’s property), Susanna, and many other women. These women used their own money to help Jesus and his apostles.

As a woman, what substance do we have and what are we using it for? What are we giving to the Lord?
Joanna had her own substance and used it for the gospel. What do you have to support the gospel? Are you just a follower of Jesus or are you also a financial partner? Ministry work need finances to thrive, even in the time of old, Jesus’ ministry still needed finances to run and we can see from this passage that women were among His sponsors.

Who says as a woman you cannot sow a seed faith? Who says you cannot make a pledge just because your husband has already pledged? Who says you cannot be financially committed to God just because you are married? No wonder in some homes men seem to be the only one financially prosperous while their women keep depending on them for every little thing, even money for offering. It’s time to break the shackles of ‘no money’ by partnering financially with Jesus, no matter how small. Joanna’s name was mentioned in the bible not just because she was healed of sicknesses and had demons cast out of her but also because she was a huge financial pillar in Jesus’ ministry.

Another point to note from the story of Joanna is the company she kept. She was not friends with women who only thinks of spending on frivolities. Her friends were also people who believed in the ministry of Jesus and were willing to support Him with their money. Who are your friends and what do you spend money on when you are around them?

Joanna in a nutshell
– She was delivered of infirmities and demons
– She was a wealthy man’s wife
– She had her own money
– She was a financial pillar in Jesus ministry
– She was also a follower of Jesus
– She belonged to the company of women who chose to use their money to promote the ministry of Jesus

You can be the Joanna of your time, partner with the Lord today.


Romans 8:19 (KJV)
For the earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons of God.

It has been quite worrisome for me when I see Christians not fully manifesting their potentials as the sons of God. It is like the world is saying “so you too claim to be the son of God, let’s wait and see what you can do”. It us rather unfortunate that the creatures wait in vain because most of the time they do not see any manifestation. They see Christians living in depression, sin, poverty, sickness, defeat etc, and they are wondering “I thought these ones claim to be the sons of God, why are they living like this?”.

While pondering on these things, the Holy Spirit started teaching me why this is happening. There’s been a misplaced priority, a lot of people are more interested in the manifestation than in the sonship. Most Christians today only think of showing off what they’ve got and what they can do but are not actually interested in whose they are. The creatures are not waiting for just any and every body to manifest, they are earnestly waiting for the manifestation of the sons of God.

There is need to develop our relationship with God because it’s the level of our relationship with God that determines the level of our manifestation. Remember, people are not always interested in what you do or can do, but are interested in who or whose you are. That is why advert companies spend millions in getting a celebrity endorsement to help promote a product or a brand in the matket. People want to be associated with a brand, they want to stick to what they know and are sure of. Whose brand are you? If you are fake you can never stand the test of time. A lot of people may walk, talk and act like the sons of God, deceiving people, but time will tell. Even demons know and identify brand names. Check out
Acts 19:15
But one time when they tried it, the evil spirit replied, “I know Jesus, and I know Paul, but who are you?

That question has been ringing in my head, “but who are you?”. When you show up what and who will you be recognised as?

In a home there are certain places one can not have access to except you are a member of that household. Sons have access everywhere, their movements are unrestricted.
However, depending of their age/maturity there are certain places they are not permitted to enter until they are of age; eg safe/strong room where treasures and important documents are kept, store where breakables are kept eg China, porcelain. This is because the child is too young to understand how sensitive and delicate certain things are. No wonder the bible said in
Galatians 4:1 (New Living Translation)
Think of it this way. If a father dies and leaves an inheritance for his young children, those children are not much better off than slaves until they grow up, even though they actually own everything their father had.

A lot of Christians are not manifesting today because they have not grown, they are not much better of than a slave. The Father is eagerly waiting to transfer ownership to the son when he comes of age, however, the son has refused to grow up! You cannot hand over your priced ferrari to an eight year old child. You cannot handover the management of your estate to an eleven year old. Sometimes even when children come of age you can identify certain potentials in each of them and know who you hand over what to. It is surprising to discover that during the reign of kings in the bible that kingship did not naturally come to you by virtue of your position as the first son, sometimes it goes to the youngest or even the middle son. We can see this in the case of Solomon succeeding David. Solomon had older brothers; Absalom, Amnon, Adonijah, Nathan, Chileab, Shephatiah. Solomon however appeared to be the most qualified to take the throne of David and he got it.

Could it be that we still have restricted access to certain things/places in the kingdom of our God just because we are not old enough to handle it? Could it be that the world is yet to see us manifest because we are yet to embrace our sonship? It is time to grow up. It is time to develop your relationship with God. It is time to study and learn the ways of God. Show yourself as a son of God not just a young child who is no better of than a slave.


Prayer focus:
Help me function as a son/daughter of the kingdom.
Teach me kingdom principles. Give me the keys to the kingdom, because God has given us dominion over the kingdom of the earth.


Parenting is one subject God has recently been drawing my attention to. A lot of parents will be judged by God for they did or failed to do in the lives of their children on the last day, so parenting shouldn’t be taken just lightly.
Being a parent is so much more than just being a sperm or egg donor in the making of a child, it involves being totally committed to making constant sacrifices to raise a child to align to God’s plans and purpose for his or her life.

During my quiet time while studying the book of Mark 9, I ran into a verse that gave me the chills and made me realise the seriousness of the responsibility of parenting.
Mark 9:42
“But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone hung around your neck.

This was not my first time reading this scripture but on this particular day it struck a cord in me. I decided to do more research on it, I discovered that it was documented by the all synoptic gospel but the account surrounding when Jesus made the statement differed in all gospels.
For example, Matthew’s account started off with the disciples asking Jesus who was the greatest in the kingdom, Jesus then called a child and put him among them and charged them to become like a child to be able to get into the kingdom of God. After that he then made the statement that anyone who causes any little one who believes in him to stumble is better of being drawn in the sea with a millstone around his neck.
(Matthew 18:1-6)

Mark’s account on this same subject was introduced with the disciples informing Jesus about someone who was casting out demons in his name but was not in their group. Jesus told them not to stop him because anyone who is for him is not against him. After saying that he made the same statement that anyone who causes any little one who believes in him to stumble is better of being drawn in the sea with a millstone around his neck.
(Mark 9:38-42)

Luke’s account pretty much went straight into the subject. He started by talking about how temptation to sin is imminent, but he then warns that anyone that causes any little one to fall into sin, it is better to be thrown into the sea with a millstone hung around your neck!
(Matthew 17:1-4)

We can see that the scenario leading to Jesus making this statement were all different, the first one, that is Matthew’s account, Jesus was talking of literal little children, while in Mark and Luke’s account, he was talking of spiritual children ie new converts.
The warning seem to be for everyone in the society because Jesus was talking generally. But the scary thing there is, if Jesus could hold the society accountable for a child sinning, how much more the parents?!

Out of all the people on earth, God saw you fit to entrust a child in your care, what are you doing with that child?
You will be held accountable if that child stumbles or goes astray.
Our lifestyle is the number one thing our children look at and copy, but it’s sad that most parents apply the ‘do as I say and not do as I do’ principle. It does not work. Children are the greatest copycats on earth, they watch and digest your every move.
Parenting calls for us to make conscious effort to live a life worthy of replication by our children.

Bible admonished us to train a child in the way he should go, but most parents are conspicuously absent from the lives of their children to train them or be practical examples for this children to emulate. Absentee Parenting is now the bane of our society.
Today, the Lord is drawing our attention to the fact that he will hold us accountable for that child that has not come into God’s purpose for his or her life as a result of what we failed to do as parents.

I also strongly believe that parents have a lot to do to help control what the society pollutes our children with especially through the media. The media is another topic for another day, I believe it is the 2nd highest rank of things that cause children to fall into sin after the parents. God will hold accountable all the porn sellers and producers, violence marketers, gangster promoter, hard drug sellers etc. that caused children to stumble.

Hanging a millstone around someone’s neck and throwing them into a sea is death. This is a wake up call for me, for you and for all of us. Parenting is a huge responsibility that has consequences when not properly carried out, today is another opportunity to turn around and make amends.


Submission…this is a word that has been under scrutiny and contention especially when it comes to marriage. Women are beginning to find the word derogatory and offensive especially with this new wave of women emancipation and empowerment going on all over the word. Women feel submission is taking away a woman’s rights, subjecting the woman to mistreatment, making her voiceless, making the woman unintelligent and taking the ability of the woman to think and make decisions for herself.

To some extent this seems to be true but the truth of the matter is that nobody forces you to submit, you totally decide on your own to do so. Submission has to do with your own will and decision to give up or abdicate your right to another person. It is you asking and accepting another person to be your head.

I will like to look at the dictionary meaning of the word submit which is the root word for submission

1. accept or yield to a superior force or to the authority or will of another person.
2. subject to a particular process, treatment, or condition.
3. present (a proposal, application, or other document) to a person or body for consideration or judgement.

From the above definitions we can see that to submit totally depends on you because you can decide not to. Submission is not by force, it has to do with your own will, that is why sometimes when we write exams, they ask us to submit our papers, it simply means on your own, with your own hand drop your paper when you are done or when your time is up. Nobody actually forces anyone to submit his or her exam sheet, you can actually decide not to submit it or even go home with it, it’s your choice, your decision and of course, your consequences.

The issue of submission in marriage has to do with a woman realising how strong she is, how powerful she is, how intelligent, rich, exposed, spiritual is and deciding to willingly give it all up to a man. Submission is saying I may have a better knowledge of something, I may be stronger than you are or even have a better sense of judgment, but I am going to let you take the lead.
Why do we even need to submit to a man you may ask?
Answer: because he is privileged to be given the mantle of leadership by God!
Genesis 3:16 (KJV)
Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

This was one of the punishments given to the woman after the fall, that is establishing the man’s rulership and mantle of authority over her. The New Living Translation made that verse so interesting:
Then he said to the woman, “I will sharpen the pain of your pregnancy, and in pain you will give birth. And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.”

It says the woman will desire to control her husband but unfortunately the mantle of rulership is the man’s.
Check out English Standard Version:
To the woman he said, “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.”

It’s basically saying, yes you are going to have conflicting ideas, desires, feelings etc but your husband’s desire or decision is what should be followed! You may have a superior knowledge on a matter but once your husband says no, then the decision is no.
This is the true gospel, pure and simple!
The devil played on Eve’s intelligence and talked her into taking a decision on behalf of the man and she did! Ideally, if Eve has understood the place of Adam’s rulership in her life, she would have asked him what his opinion was on the serpent’s analogy instead of taking a decision for the family.
Having established the fact that the man has the upper hand in marriage, what then should the woman do?
1. Be very very sure before you say I do to a man. Find out if he has what it takes to be a good head, if he can make and take good decisions concerning your home, because you are about to give up your right of ownership and decision making to the man.
2. Pray for your husband constantly, invoking the seven spirits of God upon him daily using this powerful scripture in Isaiah 11:2
The Spirit of the LORD will rest on him
the Spirit of wisdom and of understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and of might,
the Spirit of the knowledge and fear of the LORD.

A man with the 7 spirits of God is least likely to lead you astray.

Pray more for your husband’s leadership in the home more than you want to make your points heard in an argument. These days a lot of women have so intimidated men with their aggressiveness that men seem to be crawling into a shell and yet we complain that we can’t find a real man! There’s no real man! It only takes a real woman who knows her place and stays there to make a real man. When you drag a man’s position with him, he may eventually leave it for you and you run into difficulties. Stay on your job and let him do his. Be the best support system you can be for him.
So dear wife, in that argument that it seems you both can’t reach a compromise, your husband’s privileged right has automatically won it to his favour, let it go.
Submission is your right, you make the decision who to give it to or who not to give it to. If you must follow God’s way, you MUST give it to your husband. It is better not to have a christian wedding than having one and refusing to abide by its rules or selecting the ones that suits us, because having a christian wedding is saying I completely agree to all terms and conditions.



Genesis 2:18
The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”

This is a very popular scripture, but reading it recently opened my eyes to how important our role as women are in the life of a man.
A man was created whole, he had everything going for him, he had food, herbs, animals etc. He was quite busy tending the garden, naming the animals, generally fulfilling the tasks given to him by God.
However, there was something lacking in man, a helper, not just any helper but a suitable one for him.
Adam could actually communicate with all the animals, he could talk to the birds, the fishes etc, he could send them on errands and they will obey, so what Adam needed was not an errand girl. Adam was already comfortable, he had food, gold, herbs etc so what he was looking for was not a woman to pay his bills.

God saw the good job Adam was doing tending the garden but could not help but notice that Adam was lacking something, a suitable helper, so God got back to work, He took some earth and formed all manner of wild animals and all the birds of the sky and brought them to him to see what he would call them. These animals were to keep Adam amused, entertained (this explains why men like a lot of toys; cars, video games, electronics etc). I can imagine Adam watching the animals fight, the wild ones hunt, the birds flying at different altitudes but they were unable to fill the void in his life. Adam carefully chose a name for each of them but none appealed to him to be called “MY or MRS”. Even God Himself realized that these animals weren’t good enough or suitable help for Adam at all.
Then God got back to His drawing board and caused man to fall into a deep sleep and out of his ribs God took out one rib to form a woman.

I got really thrilled so I decided to check out the meaning of the word suitable. The first thing I noticed about the word was that it was an adjective. An adjective is a word that qualifies or gives meaning or more meaning to a noun. It defines a noun, it tells you more about a noun. Without an adjective a noun will just be a boring item. For example when you say “a man”, that object ‘man’ sounds so uninteresting, but when an adjective is added it begins to make it more interesting and adds more value to the word. For example “a tall, dark and handsome man” says a lot about the man you are talking about and catches the attention of your listener more than when you say ‘a man’. The adjective made the difference.
So the word ‘suitable’ is an adjective meaning:
right or appropriate for a particular person, purpose, or situation.
This means a suitable helper is that woman that is right, appropriate for a particular man to give more meaning and definition to his existence.

Every man goes through the period of bachelorhood, a period when he is just ‘an undefined man’. He had no adjective to tell us more about him. He has a job, business, friends, responsibilities, relationship with God but that one adjective he needs to define him is lacking. This was the need God saw in man when He said “it is not good for a man to be alone, l will make a helper suitable for him”.
For every man there’s a suitable helper, a customized helper tailored for him and him alone. And you my dear Mrs (your husband’s name) is that customized helper! Ever wondered why you have to drop your father’s name to pick up his? It’s because you were custom made just for him.
God made you to help define who your man truly is. You can never really know a man’s true character until he is married. You will begin to see so many shades of him. You begin to hear things like “he wasn’t like this till he got married”. Newsflash! He’s always been like that, he’s had it somewhere in him, marriage only helped us understand him better or better put, marriage gave him an opportunity to manifest his true character.
When good or bad traits surfaces in a man after marriage, those are things God wants to either encourage (the good) or wants him to get rid of (the bad). So a woman is that missing piece of the puzzle.
No wonder Adam exclaimed in Genesis 2:23
“At last!” the man exclaimed.
“This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.'”

As a woman, what adjective are you adding to the life of your man? How are people able to interpret or define him? You are the only suitable helper to help him become complete. His job, friends, business even his family can’t! Hear Genesis 2:24
“This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”

For a man to leave his family to be united to you tells you how amazing, special and important you are to him and to God who created you.
Don’t ever let the devil make you feel inadequate or inferior as a wife. God saw how unfulfilled your husband would be, so he customized you just for him. No one woman on earth was found suitable to fulfil that assignment but you. So roll up your sleeves and get helping.


Rachel has just got to be the most favoured/loved woman by a man in the bible. You may be wondering how I came about this conclusion, just come with me on this journey to discover how…

Jacob, a fugitive running from his brother Esau who wants to kill him after he cunningly stole his blessings from their father, ran to his uncle Laban in Padan Aram where he fell in love with Rachel (Laban’s daughter). He worked for his uncle 7 years to marry Rachel only to be shortchanged and given Leah Rachel’s elder sister in marriage. Long story short, Jacob eventually married Rachel by putting in another 7 years, making it a total of 14 years of labour to marry 2 wives!

In the process of the marriage a lot of things ensued, Rachel was disadvantaged because she was barren (this the Lord did to help Leah seeing that she was unloved (Genesis 29:31)). The Lord opened Leah’s womb and she had so many sons, but this did not win her the heart of Jacob. Her desperation for the love and attention of her husband could be seen from her choice of names for her children:
Reuben – The Lord has noticed my misery and now my husband will love me
Simeon – The Lord has heard that I was unloved and has given me another son
Levi – Surely this time my husband will feel affection and become attached to me, since I have given him 3 sons
After 3 sons and 3 desperate names, Jacob’s heart was still not drawn to her, Jacob had his heart locked on his ‘barren’ Rachel. Then Leah decided to take her eyes away from Jacob and focus on God when she had her 4th son. She named him Judah, meaning, now I will praise the Lord.

What really thrilled me about this story was that God Himself was on Leah’s side seeing how unloved she was, so I began to wonder how come Rachel still thrived in the marriage? Then I got this revelation: because Jacob was Abraham’s descendant, the blessings of Abraham was upon him, which he has bestowed on him by his father Isaac. Jacob was carrying a covenant promise (ie whosoever he blesses is blessed and whosoever he curses is cursed). So because Jacob favoured Rachel God Himself could not reverse it! The other option God had to try was to favour Leah to see if that could win her some love and affection from her husband, but it didn’t work. Jacob’s love for Rachel was so strong that even 10 sons (from Leah and 2 handmaids) was nothing to him . He remained a labourer for Laban for years without giving a thought about his or their future. He was content to dwell with Laban until Rachel had a son! (Gen 30:24-26)

The arrival of Joseph set a new tone and perspective for Jacob. Joseph was the game changer, he made Jacob realise he has been wasting his life and years enriching another man. The arrival of Joseph made Jacob start thinking of establishing himself, fending for his own family. He started thinking about the future, about the inheritance he would leave for his descendants. (Gen 30:30).
Jacob’s whole perception changed just because of one son from Rachel! This is the favour of Rachel.


Every woman deserves this favour from God and her husband. No matter how disadvantaged you are, God will give you great favour in the sight of your husband (this prayer goes out specially to those women in God’s waiting room, waiting for the fruit of the womb). God will remember you and give you one testimony that will set a new tone for your marriage and life.
Receive the favour or Rachel.


It’s really alarming at the rise in the rate of divorce, couples seem to call it quits at the slightest reasons. Recently I observed that there seem to be a lot of pressure on men to work harder to be able to provide a good quality life for the family. A lot of men seem to be away from home in search for greener pastures and in the process they see to be a disconnect between them and their wives. The woman subconsciously assumes both maternal and paternal roles just to strike a balance at home. Over a period of time the woman begins to feel independent of the man and if care is not taken the marriage begins to go down history lane.

While studying the book of 1st Samuel 30 the Lord opened my eyes to something I never saw before in that scripture. The story is about David and his men when they had returned to Ziklag after the Philistines refused them fighting with them against the Israelite army at Jezreel. On their return, they discovered that the Amalekites had evaded their town and carried their wives, children and possessions away. Their hearts were broken everyone for his wife, sons and daughters. They were so broken and devastated that they spoke of stoning David. Then came one of the most popular quotes in the bible “and David encouraged himself in the Lord his God”. (1st Samuel 30:6-8)

Then the Lord said to me, “I need men who can be this passionate for their families in this generation.

These men were warriors, mighty men of valour but they wept for their families. They longed for the warm embraces of their wives and the laughter of their children but couldn’t get it so they wept. They were going home to be comforted after the Philistines’ rejection but met no one! All they had was gone, taken away by Amalekites! And these men lifted up their voices and wept! They wept until they had no more strength in them to weep.
These days most men seem to willingly let go of their marriages without a fight. All that most women really want is just to know her man still wants her, her love, her intricacies, her idiosyncrasies, everything her, but unfortunately, the men seem not to be in the mood for drama these days.

God is looking for men in this generation that will weep and rend their cloths when their marriage seems not to be working.

God is looking for men that will seek His face concerning their marital issues.

God is looking for men with a positive attitude towards winning their families back. David was asking God positive questions. He did not waste time being negative with all the ‘what if’ questions.
Notice David’s choice of words:
And David inquired at the LORD, saying, Shall I pursue after this troop? shall I overtake them? And he answered him, Pursue: for thou shalt surely overtake them, and without fail recover all. (1st Samuel 30:8)

God is looking for men with a plan. David had a plan
1. Pursue 2. Overtake
What he just did was present it before God. God without hesitation okayed it. In addition God added all round recovery to his plan (And he answered him, Pursue: for thou shalt surely overtake them, and without fail recover all).

God is looking for men that will take action.
David gathered his men and they set out to pursue the Amalekites, along the way 200 men got weary and stopped but he didn’t let that deter him, he persevered until he achieved his goal.

What is that Amalekite that is destroying your home?
Are you going to throw in the towel or are you going to encourage yourself in the Lord your God, arise, pursue, overtake and recover all?
Fight your marriage today!